Mommy Tips,  Parenting

5 Thoughts Going Through Every New Mom’s Mind

You are a new mom and you are enough. Don’t ever second guess your capabilities. 

Some of the scariest moments I’ve experienced in my life have been as a mom-to-be or parent. 

Just think about the way your body changes throughout your pregnancy. It does some amazing things and not-so-fascinating things  — think about the amount of gas you passed during your pregnancy. 

I remember the moments I cried for no reason, and the times I should’ve been more emotional but acted heartless. 

Becoming a mom for the first time meant I wasn’t prepared for what lied ahead. It was exciting, but terrifying as well. 

Moments I’ll Forever Treasure

Finding out the pregnancy test results were positive — yes, I took it twice to make sure — I knew there was no turning back. My first labor and delivery experience was something I couldn’t plan ahead. The first time under the knife was to bring our son into this world. You can read all about it here

Aside from things not going as we planned, there were other obstacles faced as a family. Since moving to South Florida in 2014, we left our comfort zone behind and decided to really test ourselves in moving away from family and friends. 

Depending on one another has made our relationship stronger and we’re forever grateful for the memories we’ve created as a family. 

Related: #BeYourself Tips For Our Kindergartener
Thoughts As A New Mom

I’ve been a new mom three times, five if you count our two pups. Each time has been an adjustment for us. When we brought our firstborn home we already had our husky. It was easy balancing the two, and then we began to throw more into our juggling act. It’s been a learning experience. 

Many of the thoughts that crossed my mind were positive, however, there were negative ones as well. 

When you begin to add more to a plate that’s already full, you’ll notice things will start to fall off and others will mix in with one another. 

It practically becomes an eyesore and you almost want to put a fork in it and say you’re done. 

My mind was that plate. Sometimes, I still como con los ojos (eat with my eyes) by picking things I would like to work on instead of the tasks I need to complete.

Thoughts that came across my mind began to quickly multiple. As soon as I would think of a way to calm my nerves, another thought would pop up. Below are the five that really stood out:

“I’m failing my child”
I began to hurt myself by comparing myself with the moms on social media. I often felt as though I was letting my child down because we weren’t going out as often nor were we practicing as many lessons are we probably should’ve. I compared myself to others so much that I almost lost myself.

“I’m not contributing much”
When I was given the new role as a stay-at-home mom I thought I was becoming a financial burden to my husband. I didn’t know what to think of the idea that he would be paying all the bills. I grew up with two working parents, so this was something new to me.

“I’m going to lose myself”
I probably didn’t realize it then, but by thinking about losing myself, I learned how to find me. I worked on ways to create an image only to find out who I really was. It’s been a blessing for me to embrace the person I am — flaws and all. 

“I’m not eating right”
I knew breastfeeding my child meant I needed to eat right, so I did the bare minimum by eating less and indulging in fruits. I lost a lot of weight, but I wasn’t healthy. I looked too skinny and malnourished. 

“I don’t want to have another child.”
It took me more than a year after the c-section to realize that the trauma I went through had nothing to do with how our next child would be brought into this world. I also needed to convince myself that it was okay to have sex again and that having sex didn’t automatically mean I would get pregnant. I was just emotionally drained all the time. 

Regardless of the emotions at the time, I was also very much in love with the idea of being a mother. Every chance I get, I think back to becoming a new mom of each one of our kids and I remember how wonderful it is to reminisce on the struggles of childbirth. Even the part when you just don’t know how everything will go down — the unknown can be beautiful. 

Were there any thoughts that went through your mind when you were a new mom? Share them below! 

Former B2B editor and marketer turned Family & Lifestyle blogger. Fatima is passionate about life and being social. When she isn't running around with her husband, three kids, and two pups, Fatima helps other bloggers and local businesses with their online marketing strategy. If you have any questions or would like to connect, feel free to reach out via email: tima@motherhoodthroughmyeyes.com

6 Comments

  • Stacie

    Thank you so much for keeping motherhood real for everyone out there. Movies and social media like to portray motherhood as all sunshine and golden fields of flowers. It’s not. It’s dirty and tiresome, and you will often feel overwhelmed. It’s still amazing, though.

  • Ruth I

    The transition from being a working wife to a stay at home mom is difficult. Negative thoughts are always there. Glad you overcame it.

  • Esther Irish

    I remember thinking, “This is so hard!” It’s the most natural thing in the world. How can it be so difficult? 🙂

  • Up Run for Life

    I remember my first pregnancy like it happened yesterday. My daughter loved sticking her foot into my ribs. She is now an amazing young lady. Her birth started with my water breaking just before midnight. My x didn’t drive yet so I had to call my mom. We had been out the night before celebrating my mom’s birthday. Looking back, I felt a little off but chalked it up to being tired. When I get to the hospital, they didn’t ask me what I wanted or my birth plan. Granted I was nieve and didn’t know what I know now. So they gave me drugs in my IV so that I could sleep. I woke up several hours later in pain. I requested the epidural bc I was panicking due to the pain. Then as I was delivering her my Dr cut me without asking. Holy crap that hurt like hell for months afterwards. Sex was the last thing on my mind for a few months bc it hurt still.

    I too ended up being a stay at home mom. I never imagined it but it kinda happened. Daycare was just too expensive and it didn’t make sense to go to work and bring home $50 bucks after daycare.

    I sucked at being a stay at home mom. My house was cluttered and laundry piled up.

    Social media wasn’t a thing back then so there was no comparing myself to others. I just did what I knew instinctually.

    Now I am a mom of 3. 1 girl and 2 boys.

    Sorry for the novel.

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